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Tuesday, January 16, 2024
As reported by WMTV 15 News
For many people, making medical and financial end-of-life plans can feel overwhelming. After someone passes away, there’s a lot of paperwork to sift through and decisions to make. With so much of our information online, there’s a new effort to modernize wills and trusts to include digital assets and account access.
DEALING WITH DEATH
At the Agrace Grief Support Center, Spiritual and Grief Counseling Coordinator Bryce Woyak helps families process their emotions after losing or preparing to say goodbye to a loved one.
“It can be a really stressful time for families,” said Woyak. “What’s really helpful to acknowledge the elephant in the room.”
When someone dies without leaving behind their end-of-life wishes, Woyak says the emotional toll can become a burden on those who are left navigating what comes next.
“The emotion that I see come up most often is guilt,” Woyak said. “We feel that guilt because we really care and we want to do the right thing.”
According to Caring.com Wills and Estate Planning study, only about one in three Americans had an estate plan set up in 2023.
Deanna Truedson McKillips, an Agrace palliative care social worker, works to help loved ones make multiple decisions at once.
She recommends starting the conversation within your own family about putting your wishes in writing.
“It’s a gift in a way,” said Truedson-McKillips. “You’re laying out what it is that’s important to you and guiding your future medical care, your legal care, and your financial care.”
MODERNIZING YOUR ESTATE PLAN
At Murphy Desmond Lawyers in downtown Madison, attorney Gretchen Burgess says it’s never too early to put your plans in writing and a simple will and powers of attorney documents are a good place to start.
“Often times I have clients coming to me and saying, ‘Well, we meant to do this 20 years ago or we meant to do this ten years ago,’” said Burgess. “I think the earlier the better just to have something in place.”
As the world shifts to be more paperless, Burgess is working with her clients to include what information they have online in their legal documents. She recommends people make a list of all of their online accounts and share them with their estate planning attorney.
“Whether that be financial accounts like checking or investment accounts to those non-financial in nature like online photo libraries or cloud databases, make sure [your estate plan] specifically states a digital asset or online account just to make sure that they’re covered,” said Burgess.
To avoid passwords becoming a problem, folks should leave behind login instructions for their loved ones including the most up-to-date information. The password list can be hand-written in a notebook or typed up on a document, like a Microsoft Word document or Excel spreadsheet, and stored on a computer.
“It can make things much, much easier for the persons that are asked to act on your behalf to administer your will or your trust after you’ve passed,” said Burgess. “Make sure somebody that you trust, preferably the person that is or will be administering your will or your trust knows where that list is and how to access it.”
TO MEMORIALIZE OR DEACTIVATE
It’s also a good idea to discuss with your decision makers what you want to have happen to your social media accounts. Facebook provides the option of deactivating your account or memorializing your page and allowing friends to share memories or post on your page after you die.
Woyak says some people like this option because it can help in the grieving process, especially in a sudden death.
“It’s this outpouring of community and continued connection. It’s that idea of living forward,” said Woyak. “We’re still making memories with the person and social media is a way to continue on memories.”
Support care specialists say taking ownership of your death before something happens can help pass on peace of mind.
“If you are in a moment of crisis or if you have a terminal condition, then those decisions are already in place and you can focus on being with your loved ones and being there for one another,” said Truedson McKillips.
Agrace offers free virtual workshops about advance care planning. To see the 2024 dates, click HERE.
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